I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
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