In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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