I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
Randomize