For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
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