Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
Randomize
