I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
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