I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Randomize
