I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Randomize
