My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
