nut hugger
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Randomize
