I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
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