scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
He told me i was the nicest person he's ever arrested for DUI
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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