so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
Sober January is a disaster.
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
Randomize
