i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
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