No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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