And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
I just had sex on a roof
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
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