But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
Randomize
