he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
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