she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Randomize
