i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
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