Whod you bang
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
Randomize
