whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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