you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
I am one with the molecules
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
Randomize
