And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
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