Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
Randomize
