I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
Randomize
