called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
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