How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
Randomize
