I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
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