when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
Randomize