I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
Farmville is her only friend.
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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