There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Randomize
