Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
how does that bad decision feel?
Randomize
