Are we in a gay sports bar?
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
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