my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
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