O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
Randomize
