Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
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