so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Randomize