I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Randomize
