and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
Randomize
