dude, I'm watching paul blart mall cop. I have better things to do than listen to you whine about your recent divorce.
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Randomize
