i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Randomize
