Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize
