On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
Randomize
