i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
Randomize
