im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
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