I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
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