Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
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