I got chris browned last night
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize
