We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
By the way can you translate "sorry, she played you bruh" to Spanish? Some Hispanic guy who spoke absolutely no English callled me last night and when I tried to tell him he had the wrong number the response was "como? No no no no...." And then click. He was gone
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
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