whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
Randomize
