yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
Randomize
